Summer Summer

End of school activities always makes life a blur and I always think that summer will bring long, lazy days of summertime fun. Somehow the lazy days never happen quite like I think they will and we are off and running, packing our days full with swim team, friends, and late night outings.

Of course, "packing our days full" isn't really full like I used to do "full". My two sweet toddlers certainly make life different these days and just a day at home seems full enough to me. Add in a few errands and a fun activity and this mama gets tired out easily.

Here are a few photos of our last couple of months of life.

Family Day 2013: Celebrating 7 years as a family with Elias! We had a picnic at the park and played sports together. 

This was Elias' 3rd year to participate in swim team. It is awesome to see him swim and even win races against 2-legged swimmers. The first swim meet I had Tessa with me so had to carry her in the front and Elias on my back to get him back and forth from the pool to the ready bench. I was quite a site.

 Mother's Day 2013

  Elias got a cool new leg- Avengers!

 Tessa loves spicy salsa. Our second kid to be able to out-spice their Mommy. (Hint: the kid who can't handle spice doesn't have brown skin). Genetics are amazing!

 In June Elias got to go with his disabled sports group to a ropes course. He was so brave and was the first one to volunteer to climb the wall. He then climbed it at least four times and then did the zip line several times as well!

The first week of July we went to Laity Lodge Family Camp. That week deserves its own special post so more pictures to come later.

Video of Tessa

Most of my blog posts revolved around Tessa these days, but she's just so darn cute and we are amazed at her progress. I promise I do love my other kids too. :-)

Tessa loves to show off her little arm and when we say, "Where's your arm?!", she loves to pull it out of her shirt. I was trying to get a video of her doing that but she had other ideas and the video is cute nonetheless.

We have been working with Tessa to get her moving and she has finally started scooting around on her back. She just figured out her own way to move by pivoting her head and bottom across the floor. It takes it quite a while to get somewhere, and she usually moves in circles. But she loves it! The progression (hopefully) will be more scooting, then rolling, then maybe crawling, and then eventually getting around while upright using her hand and torso to pivot around.

Easter

Easter is my favorite celebration of the year. I love taking the season of Lent to reflect on the radical salvation and redemption we have in Jesus. This year was especially meaningful as we have experienced so much rich life in the past couple of months with our time in Ethiopia, meeting Elias' birth family (which I still need to blog about but it was so incredible and sacred that I just can't put words to it yet) and of course bring home our miracle daughter Tessa.

The transition to three children and the challenges of adoption have squeezed me a lot. And on many days the result has been pathetic- I'm tired, too controlling, easily frustrated and feeling defeated in my failures of the day. So this year Lent and Easter came at the perfect time for me to experience the power of the gospel right in the midst of my low estate.

These truths:

God is continually working in me and will complete the work He started. (Philippians 1:6) It's not up to me!

It is God who works in me to will and to act in order to fulfill His good purpose. (Philippians 2:13) I don't have to try so hard- God will do it!

Because of Jesus, I am radically accepted and loved by God. There is nothing I can add to this to make life any better- no self-improvement, good behavior, or performance (being a good mom, wife, friend and getting the laundry done and a clean house and serving others and and and) is necessary for me to experience the deep acceptance I long for. I am free and loved! 

have been renewed for me and I am so deeply thankful!

So, all that to say.... Easter was a HUGE celebration for us as our hearts overflowed with love for Jesus and thankfulness for Tessa in our family. We had some friends over and Chase smoked an amazing brisket and we ate, laughed and were merry.

Dying Easter Eggs Together

Chase's awesome brisket

The Egg Hunt

On the hunt for eggs

Eggs are so exciting!

"Choc-et" is delicious

Tessa watched the action from the back porch and had a great time with her own plastic egg.

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 We tried to get a picture of the sisters together in their matching dresses but that proved hard to do and made for an awkward picture since Tessa kept falling over.

And waiting until the end of the day to try again for a sister shot and one of the three was equally difficult but at least they are all in the picture together! (Not shown are the jelly beans we used to bribe Merin for these pictures). 

Several weeks home- an update

Tessa (Tizita's official nickname) has been with us long enough now that we're not even counting the time home anymore. I think that's a good sign. This Easter marks two months and it will be a special day of celebration.

Tessa is doing fabulous! She is content and happy about 95% of the time. Some of the biggest areas of growth are....

* She willingly lets us comfort her when she is upset. Previously she didn't want us to touch her or hold her when she was crying or upset and these moments were definitely our hardest during those first few weeks home. This is not uncommon with kids who have been in an orphanage for any length of time. But her trust and bonding with us has grown immensely and it is blissful to see her receive our snuggles and love.

* She doesn't wake up often at night! In the beginning she was up every two hours or so crying, and now she only wakes up 1-2 times a night for a short time. The best part is, she is looking for us to touch her and calm her back to sleep.

* She wakes up happy with sweet coos and sounds. I love just listening to her happy babble.

* She will drink water from her bottle and doesn't need her bottle 24/7. This was a huge step! The bottle has been her constant comfort for the last year- she literally had a bottle of formula in her hand 100% of the time for the past 10 months. But now that she lets us comfort her, she has given up on the bottle addiction.

Everyone asks us constantly how Tessa is doing. And she really is doing awesome! Life is still hard and overwhelming and some days I cry and feel defeated. But my tears and frustrations have nothing to do with Tessa's adjustment. They all center on my own struggle to release more control, become less selfish, lay down my rights, and serve and love the ones around me. It's hard, but a challenge that has priceless treasure on the other side!

Her personality is coming out so much! These four pictures capture her so well.

So talented! Sitting up against the couch by herself AND balancing a domino on her little arm at the same time!

Meeting Poppy and GiGi for the first time.

Merin got her nails painted for the first time by her cousins. She was so proud.

Sweet little spring dress that I had just to document a picture of. Lulo gave this dress to Merin last year and she is finally able to wear it. She would have loved seeing her in it.

Tessa and I were looking at a magazine in a waiting room and when I turned to this page, she yelled "Daddy!!!!"

Stroller derby.

TWO Weeks Home

Funny how easy it is to lose time perspective when life has so many dramatic twists and turns in a short time period. Two weeks feels more like two months at this point and several times a day I have to remind myself that "it's only been ____ days/weeks."

At this point, counting the time home helps me celebrate the victories with more vigor and be freer from the burden I feel from transitioning our sweet new daughter into this strange new life of hers.

Overall Tizita is doing amazingly well. When I consider life through her perspective, the transitions must be so overwhelming. I can't believe that she is so content, smiles often, eats well and seems to genuinly love being with our family. God's grace and love is covering all of us.

It takes a lot of effort to develop attachment with children who were adopted. It's Chase's and my job to build trust with her and teach her that we are her family forever.  I love to look into her eyes while I'm feeding her a bottle before bed and repeatedly tell her: "You are so loved by us." "We will always take care of you." "You are safe in our family." "We are so honored to have you as our daughter." "We are so proud of you."

We are also not going out of the house much at all so that she can get adjusted to life with just our family. In her orphanage, an average of 10-15 people held her every day! We are limiting holding and feeding and bathing and all other nurturing activities to just our family. As our attachment and her trust grows we will expand her circle little by little. I thrive on activity and interaction with people so it's a huge switch for me to stay at home all day. But it is so worth it and I really feel such grace to be content in this. Plus, it's just so hard to go anywhere with the two little girls that staying at home is just easier and more peaceful!

We've had lots of victories this week with Tizita...

* THREE new teeth have sprouted.
* She likes to feed herself with a spoon.
* She is rolling from side to side more often and with more strength.
* She will sit and play with things in the bumbo, even holding objects between her little arm and cheek while she uses her hand to grab something else.

Elias and Merin are continuing to love on Tizita and are adjusting better to having to share our attention with her. Merin loves playing with T and can entertain her for a long time by stacking toys on her bumbo tray, sharing snacks and reading to her.

Merin gathered an audience of dolls and strollers and read a book to Tizita. Notice her plastic high-heels.

Merin said she wanted to "be a princess" so I dug out this dress that I had saved for her. She immediately began twirling around and giggling. Love!

Tizita LOVES to play and squeeze her little arm.

First time for blueberries

I think she likes them!

Feeding herself with a spoon

The sisters playing kitchen. Notice how Tizita is holding the spoon with her little arm!

One week home

Tizita has been home with us just over one week and we are all amazed at the changes and developments in her during this short time.

* EATING! EATING! EATING! This is the biggest one. In the orphanage she was mainly just drinking formula from a bottle (which she had 24 hours a day) and some occasional soup broth. When I took custody of her I started giving her banana and some mashed carrots. She ate 5-10 BITES a day for the first several days. Now after one week at home she is eating 5 BOWLS of food a day- carrots, banana, avocado, applesauce, egg, yogurt, hummus, etc. She's getting such a little tight belly on her little body. I love it!

* She is learning to use her arm more and more. Her fingers are getting stronger so she can eat finger foods and feed herself.

*She uses her arm to pull herself up and down and around in her bumbo and roll over both directions. This is a big advancement as she wasn't really using her arm much before to move herself around.

* She is sleeping through the night! Her belly is full and she's getting more comfortable with us which means good, quality sleep. Previously she woke up every 2 hours but now she'll sleep at least a full 10 hours before waking. I've been gently trying to wean her from the bottle obsession but it hasn't been easy. I've been tricking her with a dummy bottle- putting a pacifier in the bottle instead of a nipple and most of the time it works if she wakes up at night.

And just overall she's content and enjoying life with our family! She is bonding well to us- won't let me out of her sight, even for a second. She screams when she's mad or if I walk out of the room. Chase said it sounds like a stray cat. My mom actually asked the other night how Harley (our outside cat) got inside. It was Tizita doing her mad cry/scream. :-)

Cartoon break

Carrots!

Playing house in the backyard

First sippy cup 

Nighttime routine in her specially-made pjs.

Bumbo Diva

All 3 kids in my lap

Such a cute sleeper!

Wagon ride with Nani